The Akatsuki Terrifying SRank Ninjas? Not!
by mariaovoxo
Summary: Akatsuki CRACK-FIC! Saki is the Akatsuki's Nanny. The boys love her of course, some more than others. But what happens when more than one person claims their love to her?
1. Freezing Cold Pools And Spiders

**Normal P.O.V**

In a small neighborhood, there was a house. It seemed like any normal house, but a group of S-Rank Ninja named the Akatsuki lived there. Their leader, Pein, hired a nanny for his group of Mentally Unstable Ninjas - I MEAN Terrifying Ninjas. Her name was Saki. She knew how to cook, and clean. But she had a short temper. Very bi-polar sometimes. She can make any S-Rank Akatsuki, save Pein, weep in their ninja shoes. She even scared the Uchiha prodigy once. Her blood red hair was always in a messy bun, its true length never shown. Some strands of hair framed her face some days, along with her bangs. Her Teal eyes contrasted strongly with her red hair, but on her it looked attractive. She always wore regular clothes. Never the Akatsuki cloak since she wasn't really in the group. This very important fact allowed her to go back to her home place -Suna- and visit her family. She was the only girl in the house, which made some things err, rather difficult [Konan is not gonna be in this story. Don't like that hoe]. Well, you see she was obsessed with _things_. Some of the things were innocent and others were disturbing. The story begins…... NOW!

**December 3, 8 o'clock P.M**

"Oooh Deidara-sempai!" I heard Tobi call from somewhere in the living room. "Saki-Chan! Do you know where Deidara-sempai is?" He asked me.

"Probably in his room, jerking off." I said amused.

"HEY I HEARD THAT, HM" I heard Deidara yell coming in the kitchen.

"Hmm? I dunno what you're talking about. I'm cooking. Leave me alone"

"What does jerking off mean?" Tobi asked childishly. Deidara and I shot amused glances at each other.

"Ask Kisame. He's the master of that hm." He smirked. I laughed, while cooking the rice.

"Ok! Thank you Deidara-sempai!" Deidara nodded while Tobi ran off to bother Kisame.

"That wasn't very nice, Deidara. I'm sure he's gotten laid." He laughed.

"Yeah, if he used a transformation Jutsu that could make him look like me, hm" I rolled my eyes.

"What the fuck are you cooking, bitch?" The all-too-familiar cursing of Hidan came. I sighed deeply before smirking.

"I'm fucking cooking food. The fuck you think I'm fucking cooking? Some fucking shoes?" I cursed back. He stood there with Deidara, both with wide eyes since they never heard me curse. I smirked. "What's wrong you guys?" I asked still amused, while putting the shrimp in the pan with the rice.

"A lady like your self shouldn't be using such fowl words, blossom-Chan." Itachi said in my ear, pressing his chest into my back. I frowned.

"You know I don't like to be called that _Itachi-Kun_" I said while turning around to come face to face with him. I looked up at him, a smirk on my face, which he returned.

"But that's what your name means, _blossom_."

"Well, _Itachi-Kun_ I don't like it."

"Well I do _blossom_"

"What ever you say Itachi-Wachi-_Chan_" The smirk on his face faded. Ha Gotcha! "What's wrong Watchi-Chan?" I asked using a baby voice. He glared at me.

"Say that _once more_ and you WILL regret it."

"Say what Itachi-Watchi?" I batted my eyelashes. "Well Itachi-Watchi"

"That's it!" He threw me over his shoulder, heading for the door in the kitchen, which leads outside.

"HEY PUT ME DOWN! HELP! RAPEEE! DEIDARA! HIDAN! HELP! HE'S GONNA RAPE MEE!" They just laughed as Itachi was getting closer and closer…..to …the …pool?

"HEY! WHAT ARE YOU DOING! IT'S DECEMBER STOOOP I'M GONNA GET SICK!"

"Heh, too late. Have fun."

"WA-" I was thrown into the freezing cold pool before I could finish. It felt like thousands of knives were being shot into me. I got out as fast as I could and ran inside.

"I-ITAAHH CHU" I sneezed. Great. I'm Sick.

"You shouldn't be wearing those cold, wet clothes. You might get sick" Zetsu said from the living room.

"Well they wouldn't be cold and wet if_ SOMEBODY_ didn't throw me in the god- AH CHU" I sniffled.

"Bless you"

"T-thanks, Zetsu. Anyways I wouldn't be if someone didn't throw me in the god damn pool!" He shifted his gaze to me.

"Well, you shouldn't have called Itachi any names. You know how he gets"

"Yeah, stupid little girl" His black side added.

"Hey. Shut up. She's not stupid" Came from his white side.

"Right" I mumbled, as I headed off into Sasori, Deidara and my room. I went in and quickly took my wet clothes off. Thanking god there was a bathroom in the room, I ran into the shower, immediately turning on the hot water. I span in circles, letting the hot water warm me up.

"Ahhh, so much better" I sighed contently. I reached up the windowsill for my shampoo. All I found was Deidara's Herbal Essences Two in One Moisturizing Shampoo and Conditioner. I sighed. Crap. Must have left it in the other bathroom. I turned the hot water off, much to my dismay, and wrapped the skimpy towel around my body. I looked down to see that the towel _at least_ covered my butt. Damn these men. I quickly stepped out the bathroom and darted to the door. I was about to open it, but someone beat me to it.

"Uhhm. S-Saki?" Itachi's face turned the slightest _barley_ visible light pink. I ignored him, pushing past him to get to the other bathroom. He grabbed my arm "Saki. I want to talk to you" I glared at him.

"Well, I'm kinda you know _naked_ and _cold_. Because a rude PERSON dropped me in the – AHH CHU – Pool. So if you don- AHH CHU- If you don't mind. I'M GOING TO GO TAKE A SHOWER!" I sniffled. He sighed and I continued stomping off to the community bathroom, as Tobi calls it. I tried to open the door, but it was locked.

"UGH." I knocked loudly on the door.

"What the fuck do you want?" Hidan cursed.

"HURRY UP. I NEED TO TAKE A SHOWER! I'M FREEZING OUT HERE!"

"WELL YOU'LL HAVE TO FUCKING WAIT! I'M LOOKING FOR MY MOUSSE!" I sighed.

"It's on the top shelf, dumb ass."

"NO IT'S FUCKING NOT! I ALREADY LOOKED UP THERE- oh, never mind. Found it" I heard the mousse nozzle being ejected. Thank god. He opened the door, looking at me with an eyebrow raised.

"Your wet" He eyed me up and down, a smirk came on his face. Perv.

"And?" I asked irritated.

"Why the fuck are you gonna take another shower?"

"My shampoos in there. So I didn't finish taking my shower. SO IF YOU DON'T MIND. Get out of the way" He crossed his arms over his bare chest.

"What's the magic word?" He sang.

"Hidan. My limited patience is running thin. If you don't get out of the fucking way, I swear to _Jashin_ I will castrate you right fucking now"

Itachi, who was now right next to me, smirked.

"Alright. Shit. I was just trying to kid around. AND THEN WHAT FUCKING HAPPENS? I GET TREATENDED. Un-Fucking-believable. Seriously." He stormed off into his room. I grinned while happily going into the bathroom, immediately staring my shower.

**Normal P.O.V December 3, 11:50 P.M**

"Nooo Stop Itachi. Noo, that's my piece of gumm" Came the sleep talking muttering from Saki, on her spot on the floor. While Deidara….

"Nooo stop. My clay un. Itachi your not suppose to eat it, yeah"

"Idiots" Sasori muttered while _trying _to go back to sleep.

There was a faint giggle.

"Stop tickling me Kisame! Hehe, your sword…" Sasori sat up, looking down at the floor where Saki laid asleep. He raised an eyebrow, and then his eyes widened as a white tarantula crawled on her feet.

"Saki?" He called into the darkness. He attached his Chakra strings to her iPod, making it fall on her head.

"The Hidan monkeys!" Her half asleep state muttered. She look down to her feet, and when she saw something big and white, screamed bloody murder. "OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD AHHH!" She jumped off the floor, swiftly jumping on to Deidara's bed and hiding under the covers, cuddling up next to him. Frightened, Deidara woke up.

"What the hells going on hm?" Sasori turned on the lights, and to there shock and displeasure, found two more of the hideous creatures. Saki was still under the covers shaking violently. Deidara shook her. She looked up, then down on the floor, and shrieked. Sasori, frightened as well, quickly jumped up on Deidara's bed when he saw the three things crawling up his bed. The three of them jumped up, hugging each other, when the rest of the members, save Pein who was on a mission, showed up. Saki quickly jumped off the bed, ran up to the person closest to the door –Hidan- and quickly wrapped her legs around his waist burying her head in the crook of his neck.

"GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF HERE!" Hidan being smart ran out of the room, and into his own room, with her still latched firmly on him.

"S-Sasori….You kill them, yeah"

"Why don't you do it! Just throw some clay at them and BANG there gone."

"You guys are S-Ranked Ninja. And your scared of some _spiders_" Zetsu said. They both nodded, ashamed.

"Well, you kill them then Zetsu, yeah"

"Uhmm. No. This is none of my business. I'm going back to sleep." He talked fast and speeded out into his and Tobi's room.

"….Kisame?" He looked down and sighed.

"Hey, did you get rid of the- OH MY GOD THERE STILL HERE!" Saki asked returning from probably raping Hidan. Her eye twitched.

"Itachi-Kun" She batted her eyelashes at him.

"Fine." In a few seconds he captured the creatures in a box, and let them go out side. Hidan peeked his head in.

"Are they fucking gone yet?"

"Yes, now we can all go back to sleep" Sasori answered.

"OH HELL NO! IM NOT SLEEPING ON THE FLOOR" Saki yelled. Itachi sighed.

"Then share a bed with Deidara, or Sasori"

"Fine" she mumbled. "Now. Everyone get out so I can SLEEP" They rolled there eyes at her before exiting. "You heard him. I have to share with you Dei-Kun" She grinned widely. He got back into his bed, He was only in his boxers.

She laid down next to him, pulling the blankets on her. She sneezed.

"EPPP YOUR SICK UN" He shrieked getting up

"WELL YEAH! ITACHI THREW ME INTO THE POOL AND YOU DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING"

"I can't sleep with a sick person, yeah!"

"Oh just shut up and go to sleep" She growled pushing his head to the pillow.


	2. Dreams, and Hair Dissing

Sorry on the wait! School, ugh pain in the arse! Thanks so much for the reviews, and people who follow! You guys rock!

Enjoy! :D**

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**Normal P.O.V**

I woke up from my nightmare panting heavily and sweating. It was the one about the monkeys taking my last cigarette. Damn those monkeys. With my eyes still closed, I yawned and nuzzled my head closer to the overly warm pillow I was hugging. I felt it rise and fall again, thinking it was my own breathing I tried to go back to sleep. But then I felt it wrap an arm around my waist pulling me closer to it. Wait. Pillows…don't…have…ARMS. My eyes shot open and I looked around. My head was currently on Deidara's chest, with his arm around my waist, and my arms around his waist. I looked up to see him smirking.

"RAPE RAPE RAPE RA-" A hand clamped down over my mouth

"SHUT UP, UN DO YOU WANT SASORI TO WAKE UP!" Deidara whispered/shouted. His hair was out of his usual ponytail, his left eye still covered. Heh he looks like a girl. I shook my head. "Good, now if I remove my hand will you shut up and go back to sleep hm?" I nodded. "You sure" I glared at his smirking face and nodded again. Ok, promi-" I felt something warm and wet enter my mouth. HIS MOUTH-HAND THINGS! EWW! I let out a muffled scream and took his hand off my mouth.

"OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! YOUR HAND JUST MADE OUT WITH ME! RAPE RAPE RAPE!" He growled at me.

"I TOLD YOU TO SHUT UP HM!"

"NOO!" I darted out the room with my tank top and either Sasori's or Deidara's boxers on. God I hope it's clean.

"SHUT UP, SHUT UP!" He screeched.

"NUU NUU NUUUUUU!"

"SHUT IT, YEAH"

"NOOO"

"YES"

"NOOO- AHCHU!"

"Bless you, un"

"Thanks! Where were we? Oh yeah NUUU NUUU"

He tackled me to the ground, and sat on my stomach. I trashed around. He growled and pinned my hands on both sides of my head.

"I SAID TO SHUT UP, YEAH" He hissed. I shook my head.

"NUU! You RAPED me! And now you're gonna do it AGAIN!" He looked confused.

"I didn't rape you, un" I nodded.

"UH HUH! When we were in bed….EW…. erm, OK when I was sleeping with you EWWW. Uhmm. OK when I was sleeping…Ok that sounds better. When I was sleeping you put your arm around me and pulled me to you! TELL ME THAT'S NOT RAPE! Cause I think it IS!"

"It's not! And you put your arms around ME FIRST!" I felt my cheeks heat up.

"BUT THEN YOU MADE OUT WITH ME!"

"That was my hand un! It did it on its own accord!"

"OWN ACCORD MY ASS! –AHHCHUU-THAT WAS RAPE!"

"Ill show you rape, yeah."

"WHA-" His warm lips crashed against mine. My eyes flew as wide as they could be.

"Heh, that shut you up, yeah." I stayed still, in a trance of total shock. "Helloo? Saki? You there un?" He shook me. "Is my kissing _that_ good, that you're speechless, hmm?" He smirked, got off of me, and left. _What a hoe._

**30 Minutes Later**

"Saki. Why are you on the floor?"

"Kisame. I have been raped. Let me stay here, until I can think normally again"

"Raped? By who?" He sounded very amused. Stupid shark fish person dude.

"Deidara."

"It wasn't rape, un." I shot up to my feet.

"YES YES YES!"

"Shut up, if you wake up Hidan he won't shut up." Kakuzu said while going into the kitchen.

"Where the hell are you people coming from?"

"Oh shut up, I've been awake for half an hour since _someone_" He glared at me "Was running around the house yelling."

"BUT DEIDARA WAS RAPING ME!" Kakuzu rolled his eyes at me.

"Saki, I highly doubt Deidara raped you" Kisame said.

"Yes he did!"

"All I did was kiss you, un! That's not rape!"

"Who'd you kiss?" Sasori asked, while sitting down at the table. Sasori pointed at me. "You. Get me some coffee." I rolled my eyes, and started on the coffee.

"Two sugars, right?" He nodded. "Kisame, Kakuzu, would you like any coffee?"

They both nodded.

"I'd like some too, yeah!"

"To fucking bad."

"Saki, I think your hanging out with Hidan too much" Itachi said leaning against the counter top. "Oh, and I'd like a cup as well.

"WILL YOU PEOPLE STOP DOING THAT?" I screeched

"Doing _what_?" Zetsu asked.

"THAT! Stop fucking coming in the middle of a fucking conversation and just adding your selves in!"

"_Is it your time of the month?_" Zetsu's black side asked. The guys snickered as my face flushed.

"NO IT'S NOT MY TIME OF THE MONTH!"

"Will you stop all the fucking yelling?" Hidan said, joining us.

"Great. See what did I tell you Saki?" Kakuzu muttered.

"ARGH! SHUT UP!"

"Are you SURE it isn't your time of the month?" Kisame asked. They all snickered again.

"Why can't you guys be like Tobi? He's asleep in his room, NOT BOTHERING ME!"

"Did someone Say Tobi!" Said man popped up. I sighed.

"No, just forget it. First I get raped, now people won't leave me alone"

"It wasn't rape! All I did was kiss you, yeah!" Hidan choked on whatever the hell he was drinking.

"You- You KISSED HER!" Deidara nodded a smirk on his face. "BULL SHIT! How the fuck does she go for a scrawny, barley 20, dry DAMAGED blonde hair, feminine dude like you! AND NOT for a buff, silky smooth hair, hot ass mother fucker like ME?" Deidara was shaking with anger.  
"ILL SHOW YOU SCRAWNY, UN!" He shoved his hands in his boxer pockets.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" Tobi was running around in circles screaming.

"OH NO! HE'S USING EXPLOSIVES!"

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHH"

"NOT IN THE HOUSE! PEIN'S GONNA KILL YOU! AT LEAST DO IT OUT SIDE" I yelled. Hidan went to the training field we had in the back yard.

"I'll be waiting girly"

"Now Deidara, I know he got you mad, but calm down! You don't have to fight!" I pushed on his chest.

"NO ONE, AND I MEAN NO ONE INSULTS MY HAIR!"

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"

"TOBI SHUT UP!" Kisame yelled. Tobi dropped his head.

"Tobi is sorry *sniffle, sniffle*" I slapped Kisame.

"What the hell!"

"Look! You made Tobi sad" I pouted. He rolled his eyes. "Don't worry Tobi, ill get you a-"

BOOM

"They started" Kakuzu said.

"No duh!"

"20 bucks, that Hidan wins" Kakuzu grinned. I rolled my eyes.

"Nahh, Blondie's gonna explode his head off, then YOU'LL have to sew it back on" Kisame stated.

"DEIDARA-SENPAI WILL WIN!" Tobi exclaimed.

"Tobi! Hush up!" I whispered.

BOOM

"Man this is gonna end up bad" I groaned. "Someone call me when their done. I have a feeling Deidara's gonna need medical attention."

**2 Hours Later**

"Saki! Open the door!" Sasori yelled from outside our room.

"Yeah, what- Oh my god! Deidara!" He was bloody, and had tons of injuries. Both his eyes were bruised and his right cheek and lip were swollen. "Oh my god, uhh Put him on his bed!" Sasori nodded and carefully placed him on his back.

"DEIDARA-SEMPAI! Oh no! How can I help?"

"BY SHUTTING UP, UN"

"Deidara! Uhm Tobi, can you please get some warm water, a towel, and bandages?" He nodded and ran off. "You're so stupid, why did you do this!" I untied his head band and placed it on the floor.

"He disrespected my hair, hm." I rolled my eyes.

"Take your cloak off."

"My arm hurts, hm!" I sighed and pinched the bridge of my nose.

"Deidara, you have two arms, and you know other than masturbation, you can use it to take your _own_ clothes off." His face flushed red, while Sasori watched with an amused smile plastered on his face.

"Fine, fine, un" He grumbled. "The shirt as well?" I nodded.

"Here Saki-Chan!"

"Thank you Tobi" I soaked the towel in water, and then rolled it to get rid of excess water. I tabbed it lightly on the spots where he was bleeding, removing the blood.

"Your loosing a lot of blood, I guess I have no other choice" I set the towel down, and put my hands on the most crucial injury. I sent healing chakra to my hands, and watched as they glowed green. Sasori and Deidara rose an eye brow.

"How are you doing that? I thought you weren't a ninja"

"Hehe, well about that," I moved on to the next injury. I briefly looked up at him, he was glaring at me. "I kinda _had_ to be a ninja. My mom died when she was giving birth to my little brother, and my dad was the Fourth Kazekage." Next injury. "He always tried to kill my baby brother. He didn't give a shit about me or my siblings. So I had to protect them. I was like the Itachi of the Suna. I was the 'Prodigy of the Fourth'. After we became allies with Konoha Lady Tsunade taught me all that I know about healing, and she trained me." Next injury. "I think it was when my baby brother was 14 when I came here, so I was like a Jonin, almost an ANBU. I used to lead my little siblings' squad"

"I didn't know Saki-Chan had little baby siblings!" Tobi said excitedly. "Can Tobi meet them?"

"There not babies anymore" I looked down sadly. "And I don't think it would be best if they knew I was here with all you guys."

"So you're a ninja, huh?" I gulped.

"Hello, Pein-Sama, I see your back hehe." I turned around, and saw all of the Akatsuki. Nosy bitches. "Am I in trouble?" He chuckled.

"Nahh you've grown on me to much. And I know you wouldn't try to do anything, because then you wouldn't have told anyone right?" I nodded. "But if you did, we'd just have to kill you" I gulped.

"R-Right" He chuckled again, before ruffling my hair. I looked back down to Deidara, and finished healing his last injury. I made the swelling go down, from his face, just a few bruises where left.

"All better" I sang. He grinned.

"Thanks, I feel great, yeah"

"You know Saki, you can be our nurse! I'm not that great at healing, neither is anyone else. What do you say? We can set up an infirmary in that empty room."

"Uhm sure, I guess I can do that" I look at Deidara who was trying to sit up. "Oh wait! Deidara, hold on!" I ran into the bathroom that was in our room. I closed the door, and looked in the draw for my red _sparkly _lip-gloss. I grinned, pay back time! I put a thick layer of lip gloss on, and ran back to Deidara.

"Were you looking for the bandages, un? There over the-" I cut him off and pressed my lips against him, smothering the lip gloss on him. I pulled away and grinned.

"Gee Deidara, red is _so totally_ your color!" I squealed. His cheeks were red, while everyone laughed.

"Uh, get this stuff off me, hmm!" I wiggled my finger in his face.

"No no nooo!" I sang. He glared at me. I giggled like a school girl. "Ok, now everyone out out out!" They rolled their eyes at me before leaving.

"I'll get started on that infirmary" I nodded.

"Hidan, are you deaf? I said to get out!" I said in a British accent. He raised an eyebrow before shaking his head.

"Did Deidara tell you yet? You're fucking sleeping in my room tonight bitch!" He grinned.

"Ahaha, very funny Hidan"

"You didn't fucking tell her!" He shouted at Deidara.

"I didn't have the chance, hm"

"Well, since he lost the fight, you're fucking sleeping with me tonight" He grinned again. "And you have to go on a date with me. Today and tomorrow"

"And since when was I a prize?"

"Well since he's your boyfriend.."

"MY BOYFRIEND! ARE YOU MAD" I shouted in my British accent. "HE'S NOT MY BOYFRIEND!" Hidan glared at Deidara.

"You fucking told me she was your bitch!"

"I didn't say she was my bitch, un!"

"DEIDARA!" I growled.

"But you're my Saki!" I scoffed.

"Since when!"

"Since this morning un!" I'm so fucking confused.

"My head" I moaned in pain. "Deidara, I DON'T belong to ANYONE"

"Your still fucking sleeping in my room" Before I could argue he left the room. I sighed.

"SAKI! COME START ON LUNCH!" Kakuzu yelled. I sighed again.

"Man, this is gonna be a long day."


	3. Ouran High School Host Club!

I am really, really REALLY sorry on the wait! I honestly had this done by the week of my birthday (St. Patricks day) . Fanfiction was not working! I'm super sorry guys! Anywhos. I want to thank everyone who reviewed, and who is following this story! :D You guys mean the world to me. April first was Fred and George's birthday:D [From Harry Potter, Lol] Who do i say happy birthday too ? To a picture of them, or do i call J.K. Rowling up? Lol well enjoy :D

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**Saki's P.O.V**

Recap; "SAKI! COME START ON LUNCH!" Kakuzu yelled. I sighed again.

"Man, this is gonna be a long day."

"Saki" Deidara sang "Can I have a-"

"NO" I then stormed out of the room, slamming the door very loudly, which made Kisame wince.

"You _sure_ it's not your time of the month?" He said while walking with me to the kitchen.

"KISAME! Just because I'm having a fucking bad day doesn't mean I'm ON MY PERIOD! Guys can have bad days, CANT THEY?"

"I gue-"

"AHH CHUU!" Fuck, I started sneezing again!

"Bless you" Kisame chimed happily. I glared at him, and sniffled.

"Shut it"

"What are you making to eat?"

"Food. Duh." Kisame rolled his eyes at me.

"Not what I meant"

"Well, I dun- AHHCHUU. Awww man" I frowned. "THIS IS ALL ITACHI'S FAULT!"

"You being sick?" I nodded.

"How is it his fau-"

"SAKI-CHAN HELP ME! DEIDARA-SEMPAI IS GONNA HURT ME" Tobi ran behind me. I sighed. How he's in the Akatsuki, the world will never know. HEY that sounds like that lollipop commercial. Hehe, I'm so smart! Oh no, I'm talking to my self again. I need help.

"Saki…Chan?"

"Oh, what?"

"DEIDARA-SEMPAI IS GONNA HURT ME!"

"Why?"

"HE BROKE MY SCULPTURES, UN!"

"Deidara-Kun" I smiled warmly at him. All for the effect. I'm so friggen evil! "I'm sure Tobi, didn't mean it. It was an accident, wasn't it?" Tobi frantically nodded.

"Are you drunk again Saki, un?"

"Noooope."

"She's sick" Kisame informed him.

"Ahh" Deidara nodded in understanding.

"I don't hear anything being made!"

"Kakuzu! I don't feel so good" I pouted.

"When did that become my problem?"

"MEANIE!" I huffed and sat down at the table, while pouting.

"She's acting like a child…..why?" Itachi asked.

"Maybe she was watching that Ouran High School Host Club shit again…..she really fucking likes Hunny." Hidan implied. Hearts immediately came in my eyes.

"HUNNY-CHAN!"

"Nice going Hidan, un"

"I SOOOO WANT A HUNNY-CHAN PLUSHI!" I squealed in excitement.

"Too fucking bad, you're not getting one"

"BUT HIDAN!"

"Aren't you supposed to be making lunch?" Itachi asked.

"Yeah, but I AHHCHU I'm sick thanks to you!"

"You pushed me over the edge. It's your entire fault." I glared at him.

"NO NO NO!" The others sighed and walked out of the kitchen area.

"Yes"

"NO!" I groaned and sat on the table, holding my throbbing head. "My head huwrts" I pouted. "AHHCHUUU!" I sniffled.

"Bless you" Itachi said in his usual monotone voice.

"Thanks" I muttered. "Your entire effing fault"

"No it's not."

"Ye- OWWW! It hurts" I said sadly. He got up and searched for something in one of the cabinets. I watched as he took out a small bottle, and water.

"Here. It will help the headache go away"

"Aww! Thanks Itachi!" I smiled. He nodded. I gulped down the water and two of the pills.

"Feel better?" I nodded happily. "Good"

"Itachi, what would you like me to make? Ooo! I know rice balls! There your favorite right!" He smiled faintly.

"That would be nice, but the others won't want that. Why don't you order a pizza?"

"Hmm, good idea! Then I wouldn't have to make anything! Thanks Itachi!"

~Lalalalalalalala Elmo's World~ [After everyone ate dinner and lunch, or is it lunch and dinner? Lunch comes first….Eh, whatever :D]

"Bitch, you're sleeping in my room, you know that right?" I groaned.

"No I'm AHH CHU sick. Leave me alone"

"Too fucking bad" He grabbed my arms, and literally dragged me into his room.

"Stupid bitch" I muttered.

"What the fuck was that?"

"Oooh nothing" He dropped me onto his surprisingly soft bed. "Well I'm going to sleep, night!

"Oh no you're fucking not! Were suppose to go on a date but your too fucking _sick_, so were gonna watch a movie. Here in the fucking base" I sighed.

"Alright" I mumbled.

"Let's watch the movie in the living room"

"SO WHAT WAS THE POINT OF –AHHCHUU! DRAGGING ME IN HERE"

"So I can fucking change duh!" I sighed. After he got changed he threw me over his shoulders.

"I'm sick, not handicapped"

"Bitch, you're lucky I'm letting you do this."

"DO WHAT? I don't want to be carried like a Ken doll!"

"What the fuck is a Ken doll?" He dropped me on the couch.

"Hey! Jerk face" Hidan rolled his eyes.

"Stop acting like a fucking kid. Here. I'll let you choose what we watch, alright?"

"YAY! Ok, Hmm lets see" I surfed through the channels. "Nothing good to wa- OH MY CHOCHOLATE CHIP COOKIES! Look! It's an Ouran High School Host Club marathon! Eeeeep! OH EM GEE! We have to watch it! PWEASEEEE? PWE-"

"Oh my fucking Jashin. YES! Shut the fuck up and put it on!"

"Yes! Hehe Thanks! AHH CHU" I shivered. I was still in my tank top and Sasori's boxers.

"Hidan… Can you get me a blanket? Please!"

"No get it your fucking self."

"But then I'll miss what happens!"

"No"

"But we're on a date! And you're the GUY! Please" He sighed.

"It's not even fucking cold."

"Hidan. It's December."

"What are you yelling about, Saki?"

"Itachi! I'm cold, and Hidan won't get me a blanket!"

"Saki, put some pants on, if you don't you'll get sicker" I sneezed again. "See?"

"But I'll miss what happens!" I whined.

"You've watched each episode ten times. Just run and get one."

"Fine!" I pouted and went to my room. "Stupid bitches." I mumbled to myself. As I walked down the long hallway I found myself singing the Barbie Song.

"Come on Barbie, Let's go party Oh oh oh Yeahh! Come on Barbie let's go party Oh oh oh yeah! Ima Barbie girl, in a Barbie WOOOOOORLDDD, You can brush my hair, und-"

"Uhm. Are you ok?" Kisame asked coming out of the bathroom. Hmm what's a British phrase. Hmmm.

"Jolly good mate!" I grinned and skipped to my room. I knocked twice before opening the door.

"What's the point of knocking if you're going to come in with out an answer?" Sasori asked.

"Oh just incase you two were doing kinky stuff again" I laughed while they glared at me.

"What do you mean again, un. We never did anything"

"Right, and my name is Saki"

"Your name is Saki, Yeah"

"Exactly!" They rolled their eyes at me. "Anyways all I came in for was to get my blanket…and iPod." I skipped to Deidara's bed and took my blanket. "Have you guys seen my iPod?"

"I saw it yesterday…on the floor" Sasori said.

"That's no help! Maybe I dropped it in Hidan's room. Byee!" I sang. I Skipped into Hidan's room.

"Hmm where could it be" I ran over to his bed and climbed on it. I laid down to look under the bed. "There you are!" I grinned and snatched it up. I rolled over so I was on my back, and turned it on. Putting the headphones in my hear I placed my head on a pillow. I yawned.

"It's kinda late." Another yawn. "Screw Hidan. I'm going to sleep"


End file.
